Buff Family News

6 tips for talking to students about suicide

Anonymous — Fri, 15 Nov 2024 16:54:59 +0000

6 tips for talking to students about suicide Anonymous (not verified) Fri, 11/15/2024 - 09:54

The end of the semester can be a difficult time for students. Pressure to perform well, meet expectations or reach certain milestones can all negatively impact mental health.

College students are also at increased risk for suicide, especially during high-stress times of the year. Talking about suicide, even if the conversation is brief, can encourage students who are at risk to seek support.

Here are some things you can do if you are concerned that your student or someone you know may be struggling or thinking about suicide.

1. Know the warning signs

While suicides may take us by surprise or feel unexpected, there are verbal and behavioral warning signs that often precede suicidal behaviors. Knowing potential warning signs and ways to intervene can dramatically reduce the risks of suicidal behaviors.

Here are some signs to watch out for:

Feelings of hopelessness

Increased alcohol or drug use

Sudden changes in academic performance (e.g., cutting class, missing assignments, etc.)

Withdrawing from friends, family or social groups

Being unable to sleep or sleeping all the time, insomnia

Expressing feelings that life is meaningless or there is no reason to live

Feeling desperate or trapped, like there is no way out

Acting recklessly or engaging in risky behaviors

Engaging in violent or self-destructive behaviors

Noticeable decline or worsening of mental health conditions (e.g., depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, etc.)

Talking or writing about death, dying or suicide

Giving away possessions

Neglecting their appearance or hygiene

If you notice these warning signs, there are ways you can support your student and help them connect with support services.

2. Share your concerns

If you’re concerned about your student, gently share what you’ve noticed and your desire to help. It can be helpful to provide concrete examples of behaviors that you’ve noticed. For instance, you may say “I’ve noticed you seem unhappy lately” or “I’ve noticed that you haven’t been spending as much time with your friends as you used to.” Acknowledging their distress can help open the door for conversation.

3. Ask the question

Don’t be afraid to ask your student directly about suicide or self-harm. Contrary to what we may think, talking about suicide directly isn’t going to plant the idea in their head. If they have been thinking about suicide or self-harm, asking them about it can be a relief and an opportunity for them to talk about it more openly.

When you ask, express your care by saying something like “I’m asking because I care. Are you thinking about suicide?” If they aren’t, they’ll let you know. Asking students, even if they aren’t thinking about suicide lets them know that it’s okay to talk about it in the future if things change. If they are thinking about suicide, it might be time to think about referring them for help or coming out to support them.

4. Listen

Listen to your student without judgment and resist the urge to give them advice. It’s important to understand your student’s pain and what they’re experiencing. Keep in mind that suicidal behaviors are often short-term and specific to certain situations. In many cases, suicide ideation is an attempt to control or manage significant pain. When the pain subsides, suicidal ideation often dissipates with it. However, understanding the source of your student’s pain (e.g., academic pressures, mental health concerns, etc.) can help better support them and connect them with resources.

5. Manage your emotions

Talking openly about suicide can be challenging, especially if a student says they have or are considering it. It’s important to notice your own emotional response and seek support if needed. If students pick up on our own distress or anxiety when discussing the topic of suicide, they may feel like we are not able to handle what they have to tell us and may shut us out. Instead, try to reiterate your care and concern. Let them know that you are there for them and you want them to be okay.

6. Instill hope

Let your student know that there are resources available to help them and things can get better. Here are some resources that are available to help students who are struggling with mental health concerns or thoughts of suicide.

Emergency services (911)

If your student or someone you know is threatening to eminently kill or harm themselves, call 911 and request emergency mental health support.

Crisis services
If your student is in need of urgent or same-day support, Counseling and Psychiatric Services (CAPS) provides crisis support 24/7. Call 303-492-2277 to connect with a triage counselor.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
If you or someone you know is suicidal or in emotional distress, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline to talk confidentially with a trained crisis support worker. They are available 24/7 and calls are answered locally at 988.

Office of Victim Assistance (OVA)
OVA provides free and confidential support, consultation, advocacy and short-term trauma counseling for those who have experienced or witnessed a traumatic, disturbing or life-disrupting event. They also offer support for those who are helping a friend, partner or family member through a traumatic experience.

AcademicLiveCare
If your student is not currently suicidal but may benefit from talking with a therapist sooner rather than later, they can schedule an appointment through AcademicLiveCare (ALC). This free telehealth platform allows students to meet virtually with mental health and medical providers from anywhere.

Let’s Talk
If your student is not currently suicidal but may be struggling, Let’s Talk is a great way to get connected with support services. They can meet one-on-one with a counselor for a confidential consultation that can help them gain insight and connect with additional resources on campus.

Workshops
If your student is not currently suicidal but may be struggling, workshops are a great way for students to learn coping skills related to anxiety, stress and other painful emotions. Workshops are available throughout the week and are covered by the student mental health fee.

Don’t Ignore It
Learn about options for confidential reporting, referrals and support. If something feels off, it probably is. Don’t ignore it.

Additional resources

Red Folder
Red Folder is designed to help you recognize possible signs of distress, talk to your student about your concerns and help them connect with support resources on campus.

Student trainings
Students are encouraged to attend mental health training sessions to learn how to better support their fellow Buffs. Trainings are available for Mental Health First Aid, recovery, student leadership and more.

Signs of depression
Mental health struggles can take a toll on relationships, academics, work performance and quality of life. Here are six signs of depression you shouldn’t ignore and where to find support on campus.

When to seek mental health support
Knowing when and how to seek out mental health support is important, whether your student needs support or wants to help a friend. Here are some guidelines to help determine if your student should seek emergency, urgent or general support for their mental health concerns.

The end of the semester can be a difficult time for students. Here are some things you can do if you are concerned that your student or if you think they may be at risk of suicide.

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4 tips to support your student during finals

Valerie Padilla — Fri, 15 Nov 2024 13:50:12 +0000

4 tips to support your student during finals Valerie Padilla Fri, 11/15/2024 - 06:50

The end of the semester is in sight and many students are preparing for final exams. Here are some ways that you can support your student as they finish their semester.

Listen

Many students are studying for tests, writing papers and completing projects at the end of the semester. Sometimes your student just needs someone to listen to them as they vent about their worries and frustrations. Respond with empathy and encourage them to stay optimistic. Remind them a break is just around the corner and they can relax once they get through the next few weeks.

Help them plan a strategy

Your student may be feeling overwhelmed and unmotivated, and you can offer to help them come up with a strategy to tackle their finals. Projects and studying can be made more manageable by breaking them down into smaller tasks. It can also help to block off study periods for each class on their calendar, and prioritize projects and exams based on deadlines.

Part of your student’s strategy can be finding the ideal study spot to get things done. They could study outside if the weather is warm, discover a new study spot on campus or take time to set up the perfect study environment wherever they are.

Encourage them to take breaks

Some students want to sit down and get everything done at once or pull an all-nighter, but that can be more harmful than helpful in the end since sleep is so vital for memory. Encourage them to take short breaks during study sessions (5-minute break for every 25 minutes of studying) to give their brain a rest. They can stretch, watch a funny video or listen to some of their favorite songs.

Staying hydrated and eating regular, balanced meals and snacks are also important for maintaining energy and focus.

Share academic resources

There’s still time for your student to ask for help if they are struggling with an assignment or subject. Encourage your student to reach out to their instructors or classmates with any questions. They can also take advantage of these academic resources—most are free, while some may require a fee.

Additionally, New Student & Family Programs is here to support you and your student and can help connect you to the right resources on campus.

The end of the semester is in sight and many students are preparing for final exams. Here are some ways that you can support your student as they finish their semester.

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Tips to support your student if they get sick

Valerie Padilla — Thu, 14 Nov 2024 17:44:24 +0000

Tips to support your student if they get sick Valerie Padilla Thu, 11/14/2024 - 10:44

Winter is coming, and common illnesses like the flu, colds and COVID are already spreading. Here are some tips to help your student know what to do if they end up getting sick.

Staying home

If your student isn’t feeling well, encourage them to stay home and away from others (including those they live with). Wearing a mask while sick can help prevent the spread of respiratory viruses to roommates or housemates.

If your student is going to miss class or work due to an illness, they should let their instructors and/or supervisors know. Encourage your student to contact their instructors or supervisors directly to explain their situation and inform them they cannot attend class. Students should email any assignments that are due and let their instructors know they will make up any missed coursework. If your student thinks they may be absent for longer, they should communicate that and ask their instructors to discuss a plan to keep up in class. Students can also contact Disability Services if they have a temporary medical condition, including illness, injuries or surgery.

Students can typically get back to their normal activities after at least 24 hours if their symptoms are getting better overall and if they don’t have a fever. This can decrease the chances of others on campus getting sick.

Monitoring symptoms

Many illnesses share symptoms, and it can be hard to tell exactly what your student may have, especially in the early days of an infection. For instance, fatigue, fever, sore throat, and headaches are common among many illnesses including flu, cold, mono, strep throat and COVID. Testing at Wardenburg Health Center or a local medical clinic can help your student narrow down the list of possible illnesses. At-home test kits for COVID are available over the counter at the Apothecary Pharmacy. Most local pharmacies also carry COVID test kits as well as combined test kits for both influenza and COVID.

While they’re sick, encourage your student to monitor their symptoms and consider masking up to protect those around them. Most illnesses can be managed at home with basic remedies.

Here are a few at-home options your student can try:

Drink plenty of fluids like water or tea, or electrolyte beverages like Gatorade or Pedialyte.

Get extra rest to help their body recover.

Use cough drops, gargle with saltwater or try honey sticks to relieve a sore throat.

Use over-the-counter medications to help manage symptoms like fever, sore throat, nausea or diarrhea.

Need supplies? Here are some resources available on campus:

Students can pick up free illness care supplies on the third floor of Wardenburg Health Center in the Wellness Suite.

Students can order free cold care supplies for on-campus delivery to residence halls through the Buff Box program.

Students can stop by the Apothecary Pharmacy to purchase COVID test kits, over-the-counter medications and prescriptions.

Seeking care

If your student is unsure what to do or has questions, encourage them to call their primary care provider or the main line at Medical Services (303-492-5101). They can also schedule themselves for a same-day call back with a Medical Services nurse through their MyCUHealth patient portal (mycuhealth.colorado.edu). If they call Medical Services or schedule for a nurse advice call back, they can talk with a nurse to discuss symptoms and treatment options, including whether they should take care of themselves at home or seek medical care.

As part of Medical Services dedication to providing on-campus access to acute illness care for students during times of high demand, Wardenburg Health Center operates additional evening clinic after-hours visits for cold and flu symptoms from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m., Monday through Friday as needed. Eligibility for accessing the after-hours clinic includes:

Illness symptoms for five days or less

Cold symptoms: cough, runny nose, congestion, sore throat

Headache, body aches, fever, diarrhea, earache, eye redness

To schedule a same day after-hours clinic appointment, students can call 303-492-5101 before 5 p.m. (online scheduling not available).

For other after-hours support, students can schedule a free virtual appointment on-demand through AcademicLiveCare or visit a local urgent care facility.

Your student should seek emergency medical care immediately if they have any of the following symptoms:

Difficulty breathing

Persistent pain or pressure in their chest

Sudden confusion

Inability to wake or stay awake

Bluish lips, face or skin

Students should call 911 or head to a local emergency room. They can also contact their medical provider if they are experiencing severe symptoms and aren’t sure if they need urgent support.

Finding support

Medical Services
Students can call Medical Services at 303-492-5101 or schedule themselves for a Medical Services nurse advice same-day call back through their MyCUHealth patient portal (mycuhealth.colorado.edu) to discuss their symptoms and figure out a treatment plan for a variety of illnesses.

Free flu shots
Students can get a free flu vaccine on campus during drop-in hours or by appointment.

COVID shots
Students can schedule a COVID vaccine appointment at Medical Services, with their primary care doctor or at a local pharmacy. COVID vaccines will be billed through your insurance plan.

Apothecary Pharmacy
The Apothecary Pharmacy offers over-the-counter remedies, COVID tests and prescriptions.

Wellness Suite
Pick up free cold, flu and COVID care supplies at the Wellness Suite on the third floor of Wardenburg Health Center.

Buff Boxes
Students can order free supplies to their residence hall through the Buff Box program.

AcademicLiveCare
If your student needs after-hours or weekend support, they can take advantage of AcademicLiveCare. This free program allows students to schedule free online medical and mental health appointments from anywhere.

Winter is coming, and common illnesses like the flu, cold and COVID are starting to spread. Here are some tips to help your student know what to do if they end up getting sick.

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Having your student home over fall break

Valerie Padilla — Mon, 04 Nov 2024 16:12:33 +0000

Having your student home over fall break Valerie Padilla Mon, 11/04/2024 - 09:12

Fall break can be a great time to reconnect with your student. If they will be visiting home, it can also be a great time to prepare for winter and complete other tasks. Here are a few things to consider with your student’s transition home.

Let them know of changes

Has a sibling moved into your student’s room? Is there a new pet in the family? Are there any other changes that may surprise your student? Help them adjust to being home again by letting them know of any changes before they arrive.

Talk about expectations

Since your student has moved out, the expectations may not be clear when it comes to helping out with household responsibilities while they are home over break. Share your expectations when it comes to laundry, dishes and other household chores.

It’s also a good idea to discuss any family plans and ask what their plans are while they’re home. Talk about how often you’d like to spend time together or plan a family night with a favorite activity for some quality time. It’s okay if your student wants some time to themselves, and it’s sometimes necessary to help them decompress from school.

Schedule check-ups

If possible, try to schedule any doctor or dentist appointments while your student is home during break, so they won’t need to worry about it when they are back on campus.

Learn about life at CU

While your student may not have been away from home that long, they are used to being on their own schedule and living independently. They may have new habits and views that could influence your time together.

Take time to get to know the independent person your student is becoming. Ask open-ended questions about their classes or major, what they enjoy about Boulder, who they spend time with and what they like to do in their free time. Keep in mind that some students may be struggling more than others. This can be a good time to determine if your student needs support.

Have important conversations

When your student visits, they may need to have important conversations with you, especially if things have not been going well. Here are some things you can do that lead to a healthy, positive experience with important conversations:

In a conversation, allow your student to share their point of view without interruption. Try to listen without judgement.

What you mean to say is not always what the other person hears—think about the intent and impact of your message. If you’re not sure what your student’s intent is during the conversation, let them know what you’re hearing and ask if that is what they meant.

When sharing your point of view, speak from your perspective. In turn, try to see things from your student’s perspective as well, rather than make assumptions.

When agreement is not possible, allow for multiple truths.

Prepare for winter

With the unpredictable winter weather in Colorado, it’s best to be prepared at all times. This is a great time to check with your student to see if they are ready for winter before returning to Boulder. Students should have plenty of layers, a winter coat, gloves, a hat and scarf, winter boots that are waterproof and extra blankets to stay warm when temperatures drop.

Reach out for help

If you have concerns about your student when they come home, you can reach out to Student Support and Case Management (SSCM). They can help you determine the signs of distress or concern, and how to connect with support resources. You can refer your student to SSCM by filling out their online referral form or by contacting their office at 303-492-7348.

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Tips for talking to students about sexual assault

Emily Sampl — Tue, 22 Oct 2024 19:20:00 +0000

Tips for talking to students about sexual assault Emily Sampl Tue, 10/22/2024 - 13:20

Sexual assault disproportionately affects young adults and can have major impacts on their well-being and ability to achieve their educational goals. CU Boulder has prevention programs and support resources available to support our university community.

It’s also important to know that families play a significant role in helping students learn about these issues, develop healthy relationship patterns and provide support.

Here are a few things everyone should know about sexual assault and tips for starting a conversation with your student.

Consent is key

CU has an affirmative consent standard

Consent isn’t simply something a student gives or gets during a sexual encounter. Instead, it’s important to help them understand that consent is a mutual understanding and agreement that people arrive at together before and while engaging in any sexual activity. Consent includes words or actions (non-verbal and body language) that communicate a clear willingness and permission for sexual contact.

It’s also important to know that any student who is incapacitated by alcohol, drugs or for other reasons like sleep, injury or disability cannot give consent, regardless of what they are saying or doing. Incapacitation is a state where someone cannot make a reasonable, rational decision because they lack the capacity to understand the “who, what, where, when or why” of a sexual interaction.

Learn more about consent

Setting boundaries is a skill

Remind your student that consent is an ongoing agreement, and people can change their minds or withdraw consent at any time during sexual activities. Helping students refine their skills and set boundaries can help ensure that they are able to communicate those boundaries with others and respect a partner’s boundaries.

It’s important to talk to your student about how they can stay in tune with a partner’s experience. Encourage them to check in with the other person before initiating any sexual behavior or when changing activities. Similarly, it’s important to help your student learn to identify behaviors that match their own desires and boundaries versus behaviors that do not.

Share accurate information

Sexual assault prevention is a community effort

When talking to your student about sexual assault prevention, it’s important to avoid recommending actions that place blame on the person who could experience an assault. Instead, have your student focus on making environments more difficult for bad actors to act badly. They can do this by looking out for others, building friend groups that keep each other safe and accountable, intervening when something feels off and standing up to negative peer pressure. These strategies can help students build safer communities because it creates a culture where people are expected to treat each other well and respect the wishes of others.

Sexual assault can include a wide range of experiences

Sexual assault includes any unwanted sexual contact or behaviors that a person did not or was not able to consent to.

Sexual assault can include, but is not limited to, the following:

Unwanted penetration or contact, including vaginal, anal or oral sex (this includes penetration by an object or another person’s body part)
Unwanted touching of private body parts (e.g., butt, breasts, genitals)

Keep in mind that sexual assault can also include attempted assault using any of the methods listed above. Additional forms of sexual and relationship harm include sexual harassment, exploitation (e.g., sharing nudes, videotaping sexual acts without consent, etc.), as well as intimate partner abuse such as dating violence and stalking.

Learn more about sexual misconduct

Tips for talking to your student

While sexual assault can be a difficult subject to broach, having conversations can help your student identify problematic situations, support their friends and navigate relationships in a healthy way. Here are some tips to help you talk with your student about sexual assault and other forms of relationship harm.

Weave it into routine conversations

Look for opportunities to discuss sex, dating and healthy communication as part of your regular interactions. Be sure to discuss how cultural expectations around gender, religion, pornography and more, might influence your student’s perceptions about what is typical behavior.

When you check in with your student, ask about their new friends and relationships. If they open up, encourage them to explore their own beliefs and values about what they want from potential partners and their dating experiences. If they talk about a friend’s relationship or things that they are seeing in college, that can also open the door to a conversation.

Explore red flags together

Encourage your student to think through red flags that may be warning signs of a potential sexual assault and abuse in a relationship. Red flags can include someone disregarding others’ boundaries, frequently not listening to others, being persistent about pursuing sex with someone who seems reluctant, hitting on the drunkest person at a party or trying to get someone alone or away from their friends at a party. Remind your student that most people understand boundaries, consent and respectful behavior, and some people may choose to disregard others’ needs. It’s important for students to recognize problematic behaviors in those around them, even when it’s someone they like or are friends with.

Learn more about drug-facilitated sexual assault

Encourage your student to look out for others

If something feels weird or wrong, it probably is. If your student sees a situation where someone seems uncomfortable or unsafe, encourage them to find a way to check on that person or get them out of the situation. Remind your student that it’s okay to make up an excuse to interject or disrupt an uncomfortable or problematic situation. Bystanders are particularly important in situations where someone is being pursued sexually because of their level of intoxication, or if a person has been intentionally drugged in an attempt to facilitate sexual assault.

Learn more about bystander strategies

Share support resources

Resources are available for students who have experienced sexual assault, want to support a friend or want to learn more about sexual assault prevention. Students often go to friends first if something bad happens, and they may reach out to family members for help. Having the skills to respond effectively without imposing blame or judgment is important to keep in mind.

Here are some support resources that can help your student.

Office of Victim Assistance (OVA)
There may be times when your student wants to speak confidentially or hypothetically about sexual misconduct, sexual assault, intimate partner abuse, stalking, discrimination or harassment. OVA is a free and confidential resource staffed by professional advocate counselors that support students through traumatic or life-changing events. They offer short-term trauma-focused counseling, advocacy and more. OVA is also a great resource to help students support a friend or partner who has been impacted by sexual assault.

*Confidential resource

Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC)
OIEC implements and enforces university policies around sexual assault, intimate partner abuse and stalking, and other forms of sexual misconduct. If you or someone you know at CU has been impacted, reports can be filed online. Anonymous reporting is an option as well.

OIEC also provides prevention education and workshops about sex and consent, bystander intervention and microaggressions.

Don't Ignore It
Explore your options for seeking confidential support, reporting concerns and learning skills for helping others. If something seems off, it probably is—don't ignore it.

Support for international students, staff and faculty

Individuals who have experienced certain crimes, such as sexual assault or domestic violence, may be eligible for U.S. immigration relief through the U visa or VAWA self-petition, regardless of their immigration status. Please speak with an immigration attorney or a non-profit organization that assists immigrants to learn more about the eligibility requirements, application process, and timeline. Learn more about free or low-cost legal immigration services.

Mandatory reporting policy

All university employees who have the authority to hire, promote, discipline, evaluate, grade, formally advise or direct faculty, staff or students are considered "responsible employees" and are required to report alleged misconduct to the Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC). This includes, but is not limited to resident advisors, teaching assistants, professors, graduate instructors, academic advisors, coaches or other university employees with supervisory authority.

Any sexual misconduct, intimate partner abuse (including dating and domestic violence), stalking, protected-class discrimination or harassment, or related retaliation disclosed to a responsible employee must be reported to OIEC. The person impacted has the choice about if and how they want to proceed. Reporting is required to help ensure that people understand their rights and options and the resources available.

*Note: Confidential campus resources are exempt from CU Boulder’s mandatory reporting policy, including the Office of Victim Assistance (OVA), Counseling and Psychiatric Services (CAPS), Athletics Phycological Health and Performance (PHP), Faculty and Staff Assistance Program (FSAP) and Ombuds.

Learn more about mandatory reporting

Sexual assault disproportionately affects young adults and can have major impacts on their well-being and ability to achieve their educational goals. Here are a few things everyone should know about sexual assault and tips for starting a conversation with your student.

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4 things to do if you're concerned about your student

Anonymous — Thu, 19 Sep 2024 15:14:00 +0000

4 things to do if you're concerned about your student Anonymous (not verified) Thu, 09/19/2024 - 09:14

While we all want our Buffs to have a positive college experience, many students may find themselves facing circumstances they weren’t expecting. The stress of college life and major life events like hospitalization, mental health concerns, loss of a loved one and relationship troubles can happen unexpectedly and may throw students off course.

Family members are often able to identify when their student is in distress and may be the first point of contact for advice or support. If you are concerned about your student, here are a few things you can do to support them.

1. Look for signs of distress

The first step in supporting a student who may be struggling is to understand and identify potential signs of distress. Some common signs to be aware of are listed below. Keep in mind that this list is not all-inclusive, and students may not always present themselves in these ways. Trust your instincts.

Behavioral changes

Significant changes in academic performance, poor grades, conduct issues at school

Unusual or increased spending, financial issues

Strange or bizarre behavior indicating loss of contact with reality

Rapid speech or manic behavior

Depressed or lethargic mood or functioning

Verbal abuse like taunting, badgering or intimidation

Physical changes

Significant weight changes, illnesses or injuries

Marked changes in physical appearance like poor grooming or hygiene or sudden changes in weight

Observable signs of injury like facial bruising/cuts or self-harm

Significant illnesses or injuries

Visibly intoxicated or smelling of alcohol or marijuana, increased or unusual substance use

Emotional/personality changes

Your student feels like a “different kid” when they come home

Isolation, major mood swings, bizarre or out of control behavior

Self-disclosure of personal distress like relationship problems, financial difficulties, assault, discrimination or legal difficulties

Unusual or disproportionate emotional response to events

Expression of concern about your student from friends, roommates, instructors or other family members

Safety risk

Verbal, written or implied references to suicide, homicide, assault or self-harm behavior

Unprovoked anger or hostility

Physical violence like shoving, grabbing, assaulting or use of a weapon

Stalking or harassing

Communicating threats or disturbing comments in person or via email, text or phone call

2. Talk to your student about your concerns

Let your student know that you’ve noticed changes and that you’re here to help. Acknowledging their distress, expressing your concerns and offering to explore resources with them can have a positive impact on your relationship and may increase the likelihood that your student will seek support. Here are a few things to keep in mind when approaching your student.

Find a good time to talk
Initiating an important conversation with your student can be challenging. You can set yourself and your student up for success by choosing a quiet space to talk, finding a time that works for both of you, explaining why you want to have this conversation and sharing what you hope will come of it.

Use “I” statements to express your concerns
When talking with your student about your concerns, it’s important to describe what you’ve noticed and let them know that you care about them. Using “I” statements can help you share this information with your student in an effective way. Here are some examples:

“I’ve noticed that you’ve been drinking/smoking more than you used to, and I wanted to check in to see how you’re doing.”

“I’ve noticed that you aren’t spending as much time with your friends, and I wanted to make sure you’re doing okay.”

“I’ve noticed that you’ve lost significant weight since I last saw you, and I am worried about you.”

Ask open-ended questions
Try to avoid yes or no questions that can be easily answered or dismissed. Instead, focus on asking open-ended questions that allow your student to express themselves and provide details that can help you evaluate the situation. For instance, you can use open-ended statements like:

Tell me about how the semester is going for you.

What are some of the things you are currently struggling with?

It seems like things at school may not be going as well as you expected. What do you think might be going on?

As you ask these questions, try to listen to your student’s response and ask clarifying questions if needed. It’s also important to listen, acknowledge and validate your student’s experience without offering judgment or advice, or jumping in to respond.

If your student is showing significant signs of distress, don’t be afraid to ask them about suicide. Contrary to what we may think, talking about suicide directly isn’t going to plant the idea in their head. If they have been thinking about suicide, asking them about it can be a relief and an opportunity for them to talk about it more openly.

When you ask, express your care by saying something like “I’m asking because I care about you. Are you thinking about suicide?” If they aren’t, they’ll let you know. Asking students directly, even if they aren’t thinking about suicide, lets them know that it’s okay to talk about it in the future if things change. If they are thinking about suicide, it’s likely time to help them connect with mental health resources on campus.

Avoid overpromising
When we have difficult or uncomfortable conversations, it can be easy to overpromise how things will turn out or provide general answers to move the conversation along. However, it’s important to avoid saying things like “everything will be alright” and “I know exactly how you feel.”

Instead, try to focus on letting your student know that you appreciate their willingness to talk to you about issues they’re facing. This is also an opportunity for you to reiterate how much you care for them. For instance, you may say something like, “I’m sorry to hear that. I want you to know that I am here for you and want to help you as much as I can.”

3. Make a referral

Student Support & Case Management (SSCM) is available to provide individualized support to CU Boulder students. SSCM case managers connect students with campus partners, community resources and support systems, while also building a trusting relationship and coaching them toward self-advocacy.

How to refer a student to SSCM
There are three ways to refer a student to SSCM, including:

Filling out the online referral form

Calling SSCM at 303-492-7348

Emailing the department at sscm@colorado.edu

It’s okay to be unsure if your student needs help. The severity of a student’s distress may be unclear, or you may be concerned about your student and not know how to move forward. Even if your student does not need immediate assistance, they still may be experiencing academic or personal issues and could use support.

4. Explore additional resources with your student

Referring your student to SSCM is a great first step, especially if you don’t know what your student may need in terms of support. Here are a few additional resources that are worth exploring with your student to see what they may benefit from the most.

Counseling and Psychiatric Services (CAPS)
CAPS is the primary mental health service on campus. They provide short-term counseling, community referrals, consultations, workshops, group therapy and more. CAPS is also available to provide insight and direction for family members or loved ones who want to support their student. You can learn more and find frequently asked questions on their Family Information page. Please note, CAPS cannot provide information about whether a student chooses visit their clinic or access services.
*Confidential resource

Office of Victim Assistance (OVA)
There may be times when your student wants to speak confidentially or hypothetically about sexual misconduct, intimate partner abuse, stalking, discrimination or harassment. OVA is a free and confidential resource that supports students through traumatic or life-changing events through short-term counseling, advocacy and more.
*Confidential resource

AcademicLiveCare (ALC)
AcademicLiveCare is a free telehealth platform that allows students to schedule medical and mental health appointments virtually. Your student can use this program to see board-certified healthcare professionals from home, school or wherever they may be.

Collegiate Recovery Community (CUCRC)
The CUCRC provides community, support and connection for students in recovery or seeking recovery from a wide range of behaviors. Their mission is to help develop peer-to-peer connections, support resiliency and contribute to their overall well-being through a welcoming and supportive recovery community.

Student Conduct & Conflict Resolution (SCCR)
SCCR provides resources and support for students who are currently working through conduct issues or need support navigating conflicts with roommates, friends, family, romantic partners and instructors.

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5 ways to support your student when they’re feeling homesick

Anonymous — Mon, 26 Aug 2024 06:00:00 +0000

5 ways to support your student when they’re feeling homesick Anonymous (not verified) Mon, 08/26/2024 - 00:00

Starting out at a new school can be difficult, especially if your student is moving away from friends or family.

Here are a few strategies you can use to help your student overcome homesickness this semester.

1. Keep a hopeful outlook

Remind your student that while it may not be obvious, many students feel homesick, even as transfer students. Let them know it’s okay to experience homesickness, especially after they’ve said goodbye to their friends, family, home or routine.

It’s also important to emphasize that homesickness is often temporary. Chances are that whatever they’re feeling will lessen over time as they become more familiar with campus life and the people at CU.

Here are some things students can do to remain positive and hopeful:

Set small, achievable goals, like attending one campus event or talking to someone new each week.
Reflect on all the reasons they chose to attend CU and the opportunities that lie ahead.
Allow them to feel their emotions before encouraging them to let go of those feelings.
Remember homesickness can be a sign that they have loving relationships with others, and that is something to be grateful for.

2. Stay in touch

As your student navigates life on campus and meets new people, it can be helpful for them to stay in touch with their friends and family back home. Even if their friends are attending different colleges or living in other cities, encouraging your student to check in and catch up can help them feel more connected.

If your student is struggling, encourage them to reach out so you can talk through it together. Allowing your student to lean on you for support can remind them that they’re not alone and they have people they can rely on in tough times. However, it’s important to remember that you are not there to solve their problems. Instead, try to actively listen to their experiences, validate their feelings and offer support.

Remind your student that while having a solid support system back home is important, it also shouldn’t impede them from spending time or creating new connections here at CU.

Here are some ways your student can stay connected:

Schedule regular calls or video chats with friends or families.
Exchange letters with one another. After all, who doesn’t like receiving something in the mail?
Stay connected and show what life is like over social media.
Create a group chat to keep everyone in the loop and provide collective support.

3. Establish a routine

Living independently, navigating a new place, taking on more responsibilities and juggling a potentially demanding class schedule may require your student to adjust their normal routine. In fact, creating a routine, no matter how small it may be, can help ease feelings of anxiety and make life more predictable.

Here are some easy ways for students to add routine to their days:

Take the same route to and from classes.
Meet up with friends, classmates or hallmates to eat around the same time.
Plan out time for classes, studying and socializing.
Find a study spot on campus.
Establish a consistent laundry or cleaning schedule.

4. Get out there (even if it's hard)

Making friends as an adult might seem harder than it used to be for many students. It may feel intimidating to be vulnerable and put themselves out there. However, it's important to remind your student that if they’re struggling to make new friends or find ‘their people' on campus, they’re not alone.

Here are a few ways your student can work to put themselves out there:

Avoid relying on one person to ‘have it all.’
Stay open to making different friends for different reasons (e.g., someone who is good to study with may not be the same person who would make a good confidant).
Get together as a group if they’re nervous about hanging out with someone one-on-one.
Become a regular at events or campus activities.
Sit near the same people in their classes and join study groups.
Remind themselves that some students may be struggling to find connections, so they should do their best to be inclusive and invite others to tag along.

5. Connect with resources

If your student is struggling to connect with others, feels lonely or needs some extra help, try connecting them with support resources on campus.

Student events

Each semester, Student Affairs hosts hundreds of events, workshops and other opportunities to get involved. Encourage your student to check out upcoming opportunities to meet other Buffs and have fun on campus.

Transfer Buffs

Your student can connect with resources, events and opportunities to build community with other transfer students on campus.

Beyond Campus Buffs

Does your student commute to CU or live off campus? Encourage them to get involved with the Beyond Campus Buffs Program to meet other students, access the Commuter Lounge and more.

Peer Wellness Coaching

Encourage your student to meet with a trained student to explore ways to make friends on campus, set goals, create routines and make the most of their time at CU Boulder.

Center for Student Involvement

There are a variety of ways to get involved at CU, including student organizations, leadership and volunteer opportunities, events and more.

First-Generation Students Program

If your student is the first person in your family to attend college or university, encourage them to join our community of first-gen students to socialize, learn about campus resources, find support and more.

Pride Office

The Pride Office supports LGBTQ+ students through community events, social spaces, resources and more.

Residence hall events

Residence halls on campus host events to help students meet their hallmates. Encourage your student to check with their RA to learn about upcoming events.

Starting out at a new school can be difficult, especially if your student is moving away from friends or family. Here are a few strategies you can use to help your student overcome homesickness this semester.

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How to talk to students about substance use

Anonymous — Fri, 09 Aug 2024 17:21:59 +0000

How to talk to students about substance use Anonymous (not verified) Fri, 08/09/2024 - 11:21

College students may be exposed to new situations that they’re unsure how to navigate, including party culture. Whether or not your student chooses to use alcohol or other drugs, talking with them about how substance use impacts their goals and how they can keep themselves and their friends safer can help support their well-being and success.

Here are some tips to help you start the conversation.

1. Start early and continue to stay involved

Having open conversations with your student can positively affect their attitude towards alcohol and substance use. Having these conversations early and continuing to stay engaged can help your student feel prepared in a variety of situations.

College students in particular are at higher risk for harms associated with alcohol and other drugs. Your continued involvement can be a protective measure for your student against these harms. As part of the conversation, be sure to ask your student about the activities they’re getting involved in, the relationships they’re forming with roommates and friends and what their overall experience has been like.

2. Allow room for disagreement

If this is your first time talking with your student about substance use, it’s important to be prepared for the fact that your student may initially be reluctant to engage with you. They may be afraid of getting in trouble or feel as though they’ve heard everything there is to hear about alcohol and other drugs. Stay open to what your student has to say and continue talking about substances. Your conversations will likely build and deepen over time.

3. Listen to understand

Being an open and active listener is an important part of any conversation, including those about substance use. As you’re talking with your student, remember to actively listen, be open to hearing their perspective, avoid debating and affirm their strengths as a person. This approach can help reduce some of the resistance they may initially feel when discussing substance use.

4. Familiarize yourself with policies, laws and resources

There are a lot of policies and laws regarding alcohol and other drugs that can be helpful for students and families to understand.

Drinking age: The state of Colorado and CU prohibit drinking for students under 21. If your student is of age living in a residence hall, they may only possess and consume alcohol within their assigned space with the door closed.

Amnesty Policy: To encourage students to help one another in the event of an alcohol- or drug-related emergency, CU has an Amnesty Policy. This means neither the person who calls for help nor the person who needs help will be subject to formal disciplinary sanctions from the university.

911 Good Samaritan Law: Under Colorado’s 911 Good Samaritan Law, a person is immune from criminal prosecution for an offense when they report, in good faith, an emergency drug or alcohol overdose to a law enforcement officer, the 911 system or a medical provider. This same immunity applies to persons who remain at the scene of the event until a law enforcement officer, or an emergency medical responder arrives, or if the person remains at the facilities of the medical provider until a law enforcement officer, emergency medical responder or medical provider arrives. The immunity described above also extends to the person who suffered the emergency drug or alcohol overdose event.

Smoking policy: CU is also a smoke- and tobacco-free campus. This policy applies to all vape products, marijuana and cigarettes.

Workshops: CU Boulder provides a variety of resources to help students. Health Promotion offers free substance use workshops that allow students to discuss substance use with a peer or professional staff member.

Collegiate Recovery Community: The Collegiate Recovery Community (CUCRC) provides a space for students who are in recovery or seeking recovery from substances to find community, attend meetings and attend substance-free events.

5. Discuss how drinking affects the body

There is a lot of misinformation about how alcohol can impact the body. You can support your student by providing accurate information about the following effects from alcohol:

Alcohol is absorbed from the stomach into the bloodstream.
At lower blood alcohol concentrations, alcohol can lead students to have a sense of relaxation and well-being in addition to impairments to their thoughts, judgment and coordination.
At higher concentrations, it can lead to feelings of depression, mood swings, unconsciousness and loss of control over basic bodily functions that can be fatal.

Talk with your student to see how familiar they are with this process and help provide additional information if needed.

6. Discuss what to do in an emergency

Whether your student chooses to drink or not, there is a possibility that they will be in a situation where they need to support another student in an emergency. At CU Boulder, we want every student to have the ability to help one another. Here are some skills you can share with your student to help them respond in an emergency situation.

Signs a student should watch for:	How they should respond:
Passed out or unresponsive Slow or no breathing Vomiting while passed out Involuntary peeing or pooping Pale/bluish or cool/clammy skin Pinpoint (small) pupils Making gurgling, wheezing or snoring sounds	Turn the person on their side and put them in the recovery position. Immediately call 911 and wait for help to arrive. Make sure the person is in a safe area to avoid injury. Administer naloxone if available (naloxone will not harm someone, even if they are not overdosing). Never leave a severely intoxicated person alone or with someone who is not a trusted friend.

7. Share your values and experiences

Continue to talk with your student about your family’s values related to alcohol and other drugs. This can include discussions about how substance use may impact their academic success and overall college experience.

When talking about substances and their impacts, your student may ask questions about what it was like when you were in college. Be honest with them about your experience but try to avoid stories that normalize or idolize substance use.

8. Correct misconceptions

Long before they step foot on campus, students may have assumptions or expectations around what the ‘college experience’ looks like. Most of these messages, whether from friends, movies or social media, normalize drinking, partying and hookup culture.

However, according to a 2023 National College Health Assessment survey of CU Boulder students, more than 66% of students reported either not using alcohol or not binge drinking within the past two weeks. Helping your student realize that most students aren’t drinking or using marijuana on a regular basis may help them feel more comfortable about making the decision not to drink. It can also help them realize that there isn’t a standard ‘college experience’ they need to live up to.

9. Understand why students use substances

There are many reasons that factor into why students do or do not use alcohol or other drugs. Talking through potential motivations can help guide your conversations, and it allows you to reinforce your student’s decisions to not use substances or use them in a safer way. It’s also important to understand the misconceptions your student may have about substance use. This can also be a good time to brainstorm other ways your student can have the experiences they want.

Alcohol use

Motivations for using	Motivations for not using
Enhance social interactions Facilitate interactions with a potential romantic or sexual partner Reduce stress Fit in Improve mood Address boredom Peer pressure Experimentation or curiosity Alter perception	Plan to drive Have other things to do Sleep problems Productivity or motivation issues Memory problem Don’t want to spend money Don’t want to lose control Avoid unwanted experiences Legal or conduct penalties, avoid fines Academic impacts Increased risk of sexual assault Physical injury

It’s important to remember that students may have different reasons for using substances, and it may depend on the substance itself. Keep in mind that substances that students use today may be different from the ones you remember from your experiences. For instance, cannabis is far more potent now than it was in the ‘70s and ‘80s.

We hope you’ll find these tips helpful as they are supported by expert research. You can find more information by checking out a free copy of Dr. Rob Turrisi’s Parent Handbook for Talking with College Students 91��Ƭ�� Alcohol. This resource has been proven to help reduce alcohol-related harms in college students through parental and family conversations.

Resources

Health Promotion	Collegiate Recovery Community (CUCRC)	Counseling and Psychiatric Services (CAPS)	Naloxone
Health Promotion supports students through a number of services, including free harm reduction supplies, party smart activities, free substance use workshops, nicotine cessation resources, recovery ally trainings and more.	The CUCRC provides community and support for students who are in recovery or seeking recovery from a variety of harmful behaviors, including substance use.	CAPS provides a variety of specialized services for students who are interested in addressing substance use issues, including screening appointments, evaluations and therapy.	Students can learn more about naloxone and how to use it through on-campus resources. All CU students can access free naloxone on campus. Having naloxone on hand can help your student feel more prepared to help a fellow Buff in a potential overdose situation.

Whether or not your student chooses to use alcohol or other drugs, talking with them about how substance use impacts their goals and how they can keep themselves and their friends safer can help support their well-being and success. Here are some tips to help you start the conversation.

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3 reasons why your student should work on campus

Anonymous — Wed, 07 Aug 2024 20:21:10 +0000

3 reasons why your student should work on campus Anonymous (not verified) Wed, 08/07/2024 - 14:21

Working on campus offers many benefits for students. Some jobs allow students to build technical skills and are a great way to explore potential careers. Others may offer some downtime and let students study around their job duties.

If your student is looking for a part-time job, here are a few reasons why they should consider working on campus this year.

1. Enjoy a flexible schedule

One of the best perks of an on-campus job is flexibility. Most student jobs offer flexible scheduling around classes and other commitments, as well as during busy times of the semester (like finals). Many students work between 10 and 15 hours weekly, with 25 hours per week maximum. Academics stay the priority for students who work on campus.

2. Get to know fellow Buffs

The other students your student might work with can quickly become their new friends. Departments like the Rec Center, Environmental Center, Residence Life and Campus Dining Services are some of the largest employers of students. These jobs would allow your student to spend time with fellow Buffs and get to know them.

On-campus jobs also offer students the chance to work more closely with faculty and staff. As supervisors, faculty and staff can become mentors and potentially lead to future internships or research opportunities. Additionally, they can provide letters of recommendation or serve as professional references later.

3. Gain professional experience and skills

Whatever department your student works in, their student job can help them build their resume.

Many students develop foundational skills at on-campus jobs that they can use in professional positions after college. These skills include communication, problem-solving, time management and leadership.

There are also student jobs specific to different industries that can teach your student technical skills. These roles include work in graphic design, event planning, social media, data analytics and research.

Resources

Is your student ready to apply? They can use Handshake to search for on-campus student employment, including hourly and work-study positions. Each CU Boulder student already has a Handshake account, regardless of their major or year.

On-Campus Student Job Fair	Career Services	Work in Student Affairs
Sept. 4 \| 2-4:30 p.m. \| UMC South Terrace Encourage your student to stop by this event on Sept. 4. They can meet with campus employers who are looking to hire students and explore job opportunities.	Career Services is dedicated to helping students gain clarity about their future through accessible and inclusive guidance. No matter where your student is at in their journey, Career Services has the support and resources to help.	More than 2,000 students work in the Division of Student Affairs, with job roles ranging from peer mentoring to event planning to social media content creation and university operations. Student employees directly contribute to the success of our campus community.

On-Campus Student Job Fair

Career Services

Work in Student Affairs

Sept. 4 | 2-4:30 p.m. | UMC South Terrace

Encourage your student to stop by this event on Sept. 4. They can meet with campus employers who are looking to hire students and explore job opportunities.

Career Services is dedicated to helping students gain clarity about their future through accessible and inclusive guidance. No matter where your student is at in their journey, Career Services has the support and resources to help.

More than 2,000 students work in the Division of Student Affairs, with job roles ranging from peer mentoring to event planning to social media content creation and university operations. Student employees directly contribute to the success of our campus community.

If your student is looking for a part-time job, here are a few reasons why they should consider working on campus this year.

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Tips for living with roommates

Anonymous — Thu, 25 Jul 2024 06:00:00 +0000

Tips for living with roommates Anonymous (not verified) Thu, 07/25/2024 - 00:00

Living with roommates, whether your student is in the residence halls or off campus, can be a great experience. It may also bring new challenges and responsibilities. This might be the first time your student will share a room or live with someone they’ve never met.

While many Buffs get along with their roommates, disagreements can happen. This is normal and working through conflict often leads to growth and stronger relationships. Here are some tips to share with your student to help them create a positive living environment and navigate conflict.

1. Communicate

Encourage your student to get to know their roommate the first few weeks of the semester. They can seek out things they have in common and allow space for differences. Even if your student already knows their roommate well, they should still take time to talk about the upcoming semester and routines. Communication is key to understanding each other’s habits, schedules and preferences.

2. Set ground rules together

As your student gets to know their roommate, this is a great time to establish ground rules to prevent misunderstandings later. Topics they could discuss include:

Guests: Is your student okay with overnight guests? Are there times of the day or evening that they would prefer to not have guests over?
Chores: Who’s responsible for cleaning common areas or taking out the trash, and how often? Will there be a schedule for completing chores?
Shared belongings: What items in your student’s space will be shared (electronics, appliances, supplies, food, etc.)? Are there certain items that your student prefers not to be shared?
Finances: If your student lives off campus and is responsible for rent and utilities, how will those be divided and paid?

Creating a roommate agreement is an easy way for your student to discuss and agree on expectations with their roommate. If your Buff lives on campus, their resident advisor (RA) will work with them during their first week on campus to set one up. If your student lives off campus, they can use this free roommate agreement template to get started.

3. Compromise

During your student’s discussion with their roommate, there might be preferences that could cause conflict or topics that they don't initially agree on. Encourage your student to be open to compromise. For example, if they like to study on Friday afternoons and their roommate likes to invite friends over at the end of the week, could your student study at the library instead of asking for quiet hours during that time? Finding areas of compromise and respecting each other’s preferences can help your student and their roommate both feel more comfortable in their living environment.

4. Respect each other’s space and belongings

Living in the residence halls or apartments can mean tight quarters, but your student and their roommate still have a right to privacy and boundaries. Encourage your student to:

Ask before they borrow items belonging to their roommate, including food, clothes and toiletries.
Share plans with their roommate that might affect them, like if they’ve invited guests over or if they’re going out of town for the weekend.
Respect the ground rules that they've set up together—quiet hours, responsibilities with chores, etc.

5. Address issues quickly and in person

It’s best to address roommate issues quickly before they fester. Encourage your student to discuss any important topics or reminders with their roommate in person, if possible. Bringing up issues through texting, social media or sticky notes might lead to miscommunication or increased frustrations. A simple reminder to “take out the trash” could become something more than we intended.

Here are a few other tips to share with your student when it comes to addressing issues:

Your student should give themselves time to think through how they can express their needs before approaching their roommate.
Using “I” statements to describe how the situation makes them feel is a helpful way to start. For example, “I feel frustrated when guests eat my snacks because it’s hard for me to make it to the grocery store.”
Respect goes both ways: they should listen for understanding and ask follow-up questions during the conversation.

If your student is nervous about talking with their roommate, suggest that they connect with their RA or Conflict Resolution to help mediate the conversation. Remind them that conflict can be a good thing. Even though it may seem daunting, talking it through can lead to a healthier relationship with their roommate.

6. Find support with campus resources

Students have access to a variety of resources to help resolve roommate conflict. If your student is ever concerned about their roommate, they can reach out to Student Support and Case Management or Student Conduct and Conflict Resolution for guidance.

Resident advisors (RAs)

Students living on campus can reach out to their RA for more support. RAs are a great resource to help mediate conversations and find common ground. Be sure to talk with your roommate beforehand and schedule a time with your RA to discuss potential or unresolved issues.

Residence Life

Residence Life helps students who live on campus build community, engage in leadership opportunities and make the most of their stay in the residence halls. They offer a variety of events, tutoring services, employment opportunities and more.

Conflict Resolution

All students can visit Conflict Resolution, regardless of whether you live on or off campus. They can help you navigate conflicts between roommates, significant others, professors, classmates, etc. They also offer free workshops, mediation and coaching sessions to help you improve your conflict management and resolution skills.

Off-Campus Housing & Neighborhood Relations (OCHNR)

OCHNR is here to help students with all aspects of living off campus, from searching for an apartment and roommate, understanding Boulder housing options and providing free lease reviews with our staff attorney, navigating roommate disagreements, understanding Boulder ordinances and advocating for tenant rights.

Peer Wellness Coaching

Peer wellness coaches provide peer-to-peer support and are available to meet with students living on or off campus. They can help you navigate concerns related to roommates, relationships, stress, finances and more. Peer wellness coaches can also help you set goals, connect with other resources and create self-care plans.

Center for Inclusion and Social Change (CISC)

CISC works with LGBTQ+ students living on and off campus. They can provide information on gender-inclusive residence hall programs, gender-neutral facilities and more. Their office can also help students find inclusive housing and roommates who will be welcoming and supportive.

Disability Services

Disability Services works with University Housing to provide reasonable on-campus housing and dining accommodations for students with disabilities. Students interested in obtaining housing or dining accommodations will need to register with Disability Services and provide documentation before they can submit a new accommodations request.

Student Legal Services (SLS)

SLS helps students resolve or minimize their legal situations so you can focus on school. Consultations about landlord/tenant matters are free. Representation for other legal issues is available for a fraction of the cost of a private attorney to all CU Boulder students paying student activity fees.

Living with roommates, whether your student is in the residence halls or off campus, can be a great experience. It may also bring new challenges and responsibilities. Here are some tips to share with your student to help them create a positive living environment and navigate conflict.

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